Sharing Stories in Bits & Bites

Never Eat Soggy Waffles

Kids: ‘Mo-om! Can _____ sleepover?’

‘Hey, if she’s having a friend, can I ask _____?’

‘Seriously? That’s too many girls…I’m asking _____ too!’

Me: ‘Yah, whatever…chaos is chaos’

I care not, once you have a certain number of spawn underfoot, you lose ALL sensitivity…to the noise, to the mess, to the utter insanity. Much rather have them nearby where I can spy on them anyway. Their friends will tell you all sorts of stuff your kids won’t…the new crush, what the teacher said about them in class…oh yah…keep ’em close…get the that. Have you ever noticed how much NICER your kids friends are to you?  It always restores my faith that teenagers aren’t totally self-centered, iPhone zombies. I know they are sucking up…I mean, they don’t ACTUALLY like my hair today…but I’ll take what I can get.

Really, it’s all fun and games and such UNTIL you have to feed them the next morning. Never mind the teenage boys, those itty-bitty, dancing girls are deceiving…they eat like six foot linebackers, truly insatiable…and gross, they are really disgusting sometimes, don’t be fooled by their adorable stage presence. I like to keep it simple and make waffles, feed them in shifts, get them to help slice strawberries, set the table, cook the bacon, while I take charge of the almighty waffle iron. It was always a breakfast gamble for me though…I tried different mixes, different recipes, none of them were ever 100%.

My dream waffle, yes…dream waffle, don’t judge me…was the Belgian at John’s Place in Victoria, BC. Perfectly crispy on the outside, light and fluffy inside, oh baby. Not just a mnemonic to me…I Never Eat Soggy Waffles! Every once in a while, I’d get close, but he…Mr.D.W, continually eluded me.

Until. Last. Summer.

While staying with my fabulous friend T, as we relocated our entire lives from one community to another, she whipped up a batch of these bad boys, from scratch…without looking at the recipe. Was I impressed? Damn rights! And they were perfection! SO, being the recipe thief that I am, I have it to share with you. What? Yes, and just in time for ‘International Waffle Day’ on March 25th!

Mr. Dream Waffle

Ingredients (makes eight large waffles)

  • 4 cups of regular (NOT cake) flour
  • 4 tsp baking powder ..SIFTED (yes, really) together
  • 8 separated eggs (yolks in a big bowl, whites in your mixer)
  • 8 tbsp melted butter
  • 4 tbsp white sugar (it’s a once in a while treat)
  • 2 tbsp vanilla
  • 4 cups of milk (almond works fine)

1. After sifting flour and baking powder together, set aside. Heat butter and allow to cool for a few moments before measuring into the milk and vanilla. The milk cools down the melted butter so when you add the yolks…now…they don’t get all scrambled-yuck! Now beat those egg whites until they form nice stiff white peaks, really firm, like we all used to be…sigh.

2. Heat up your waffle iron, oh man…I just got a new one & it is the bomb…makes four big waffles at a time, nothing sticks to it, not even fruit or chocolate chips!

3. Add your liquids to your flour mixture…DON’T OVERMIX, let the lumps live, then fold in your egg whites with a spatula. It’s going to seem like there is too much egg white, don’t worry it all mixes in and will be perfect!

4. If you want to add blueberries, or chocolate chips or bacon bits…in my humble experience, I like to pour on a bit-o-batter, sprinkle toppings & then add a bit more batter on top. Keeps it all nice & tidy, unlike my kitchen…

5. Cook them for as long as your waffle iron says to, then if you are feeding a crowd, you can keep them in a 250 degree oven, don’t stack them though!!! Then the crispy perfection disappears, sadness. Add your favourite toppings, whipped cream, maple syrup with melted cream cheese (my fave , also from John’s Place) berries, Nutella…mmmm…

This is NOT the healthy version…this is the once-in-a-while-treat version. Confession time: I did attempt an agave, chia, hemp seed adaptation this am.  Not a TOTAL failure but it certainly needs work before I share.  Time to serve and bask in the glow of happy, full, children, this is the perfect time to get all sorts of sticky, sweet secrets out them…just nod,  smile &  chew on Mr. D.W.

“We can stay up late, swapping manly stories and in the morning…I’m making WAFFLES!” ~ Donkey

2 thoughts on “Never Eat Soggy Waffles”

  • The first time I ever had waffles I slept over at your house and your Mom made them for us – on that old round waffle maker. I patiently had to wait to have seconds. Good times.

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